Wednesday, December 22, 2010

'Twas the Night Before Christmas - A Black Ops Tale

Christmas is alomost here... and for vet gamers. that means one thing...

Loads and loads of free kills.

So, I thought I would write my own verison of the Night Before Christmas with a Black Ops twist...

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the net
Black Ops vets were smiling from the kills they would get
Controllers were set by the console with care
Knowing new players soon would be there

The kiddies were thinking of kills in their heads
Not knowing how quickly they soon would be dead
MW2 was easy, they could always tube
So of course Black Ops will be friendly to noobs

Morning had come and so anxious to see
That copy of Black Ops under the tree
As the wrapping is torn, he can barely sit still
Anxious to post that first clip of his skill

The disc it gleamed when set in the tray
Controllers charged and ready to play
While he plopped on the couch to join the fight
And the tv it hummed, coursing with light

The game finished loading, it wouldn’t be long
Because combat training would make him strong
He couldn’t decide the first weapon he’d try
Or what attachments he wanted to buy
Now Uzi! Now AK! Now Famas, Galil!
On noob tube! On red dot! On Weapons of steel!
With so many options from which to choose
There was no way in hell he was going to loose

He moves about quickly, all through the map
Mowing down friend-bots, Ratta-tap-tap-tap
“This game is easy!” he says out loud
So smug and so sure and surprisingly proud

Two minutes later, he’s in a lobby
Surrounded by prestigers and some dude named Robby
Their emblems are slick, their scores are high
But he knows he’ll get them, they’re waiting to die

Once into Deathmatch, he started to run
With lightweight, grenade and MP5 gun
He rounded a corner, anxious to kill
But fell over dead by a shot from a hill

I died too quickly, that isn’t fair
The game just started, he couldn’t be there
Yet two steps in on his second life
He’s stabbed in the back with a ballistic knife

Run and gun is not working, unsure what to do
Because there’s no default weapon with a tube
He smiles to himself and changes his class
He’ll find a dark corner and camp off his ass

Sitting all snug, his aim at the door
Thinking of corpses littering the floor
When through the window and what should appear
Grenades and semtex full of holiday cheer

When the game was over, he sat there all stunned
Going 20-0, that would have been fun
Instead his score was so pitifully low
All he did was die, everywhere he’d go

While the vet sat smiling, his score through the roof
So happy the kiddies ignored the truth
Modern Warfare was easy. Black Ops is tight.
“Merry Christmas to all, and to vets a good night!”
Merry Christmas!

Monday, November 8, 2010

And to all, a good night...

I remember vividly the anticipation of Christmas morning as kid. Sneaking down the stairs to see what Santa had left... looking at how full the stocking was. Trying to will myself to go back to sleep so that my when my mom woke me up, it would be time.

I feel like that this November. Right now.

My stocking is full of frags. The tree ringed with claymores. And Santa... he left me 15 levels of prestige to last for months. The anticipation is all but over... now, the fun really begins. I hope to remember how I feel now when the first twinge of frustration takes over. It's a great feeling.

Merry Christmas, Call of Duty fans.

It's Black Ops night.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Try and Have a Little Judgement

I love the customization in Black Ops... or at least I think I will when I get the game at the midnight launch.

I'm not going to love all the garbage people will be putting up.

Like this piece of crap:

I know Treyarch has a ban system in place.

I think it's time to give that baby a run, too.

Generation Now...

Myself, I'm of the generation the media labeled "X". Somewhere between graduating college and my first child, Generation"Y" came along. To be honest, I have no idea what the current generation's been labled (in more truth, I don't care) but I know what I think of it:

Generation Now.

Looking for music... hit up iTunes. Need a new book... now, where did I put my Kindle? Let's not forget the 2,000 things you can do with your phone on demand. This is you... and me. Everything on demand or there's something wrong.

What happened to patience? Case in point... Black Ops.

Black Ops is not the first game to played early, bought from stores that don't honor their commitments by players who don't have the patience to simply wait for it be released. Is there anything wrong with this? A little. All it would have taken is for the store owners to simply say, "Sorry but it's for sale on the 9th." But in this economy, they feel the pressure to make a sale. If they don't, the guy down the street will.

Because Generation Now demands it.

In the end, the person holding that copy of Black Ops is most responsible. They knew what the release date is. Gotta be the first to stream "ma skilz" or post my clip on YouTube. Hopefully the servers will be reset (never should have been turned on anyway) and the playing field will be a little more level day one. It's just a shame no one could show a little restraint, a little patience.

But that's not Generation Now.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Funny "Time" on the Black Ops Forums

Took this snapshot... matches my sense of humor.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

This is so wrong...

Sorry to ruin your day...

Monday, May 31, 2010

"Lost" thoughts...

Finally watched the Lost series finale. It was... good?

After 6 years of wondering what was in the hatch to wandering polar bears, the mind bending, time traveling series has come to "The End". But what end? I guess not the one I would have chosen but one fitting Lost. It was not always the most consistent show, shifting directions and time in a manner that could be a challenge to follow, yet, pull you in so deep that you couldn't help but come back.

It reinvigorated serialized television for certain.

So, why was the ending just good? I would have preferred the survivors existing in an alternate universe/timeline. They time travelled, right? Maybe I'm a sucker for happy endings and Jack's death could have saved two universes. In the end, it just had him dying to get some people off the island. But that is Lost in its most refined essence.

Funny thing is I didn't watch the series from the start. I missed the first couple of episodes and knew this was a show where picking up it up in the middle would not be smart. But the week I spent watching season 1 on DVD was the best week of TV ever. Period. I was hooked. I'm going to watch season 1 again... and buy the other 5. That will be the best way to enjoy Lost -- without commercials, in one long series of episodes where you can look for the clues that built up to "The End".

It's a series worth revisiting, dissecting, and most importantly, savoring. There will be many pretenders to follow but none that will reach it for a long time.

Now, excuse me while I open the hatch...

Friday, May 28, 2010

Memorial Day Weekend...

... should be fun. I'm going to spend time with those I care about and get in some quality time on Modern Warefare 2 double XP.

Fun? Yes... but paid for by the sacrifice of others.

Never forget what this weekend is about. It's not just about beer, brauts, and gaming. It's about remembrance and honoring those who gave their life so you can enjoy beer, brauts, and gaming. People like John Finn.

John Finn, a Medal of Honor recipient for his actions during the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor, salutes at the groundbreaking ceremony for the USS Oklahoma memorial on Ford Island in Pearl Harbor, Hawaii, in 2006. Finn, the oldest Medal of Honor recipient from World War II, died May 27 at his San Diego-area home at age 100.

So... when you are gaming on MW2, change your clan tag to a branch of the US Armed forces. You'll find me rockin' USAF. Have fun, enjoy your life. Afterall, they didn't sacrifice their lives for you to be somber all the time. They did it so you could be happy... and free.

Take a day to honor them back.

What the hell...

... I'll give this is a shot.

Blogging is not something I truly considered ever doing. It's not that I don't have a lot to say, on the contrary, I'm full of too many thoughts. I've never felt a real need to share them with people I don't know from a hole in the wall.

So, what's changed?

Truth is, I don't know. But what I plan on pontificating about will range from thoughts on gaming, sports, movies, politics... really whatever is on my mind at the moment. Don't be shocked if I wax poetic now and again.

Cheers all,